I just made out with a guy for $7.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize