She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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