Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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