I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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