Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize
