seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Drunk is not a location!
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
