She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
And then he peed in my hair
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