We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
i think i have two assholes
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
