Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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