Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize