Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
