we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize