craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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