Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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