3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
