bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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