if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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