i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize