I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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