69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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