You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
