Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
