Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
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I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
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And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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