I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
