Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
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