The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Randomize
