doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Never underestimate the power of titties
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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