Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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