I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
