Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
