My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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