I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
ugly people sure do ruin things
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
