you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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