garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
