I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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