if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize