i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
