i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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