I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
