Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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