The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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