He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Randomize
