i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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