I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Damn victory sex feels great
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
