"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
