he shaved USA in his pubs
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
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