Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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