I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
