i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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