elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
