you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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